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Questions that Haunt Me...

Robert

Robert

NLC
NLC
  • Can you cry under water?
  • How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
  • Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. But it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
  • Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
  • Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
  • What disease did cured ham actually have?
  • How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
  • Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
  • If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
  • Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
  • Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
  • Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
  • Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
  • Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
  • If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
  • Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
  • If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
  • Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
  • If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
  • If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
  • If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
  • Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
  • Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
  • Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ---?
  • Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
 
All important questions ....

questions said:
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Click to expand...

This I feel to be the most important though ...
 
Some more.

  • If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?
  • Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
  • Can you make a candle out of your earwax?
  • When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
  • Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?
  • If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
  • Can a fire truck park in the fire lane?
  • Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time?
  • "Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?
  • Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?
  • Are marbles made of marble?
  • Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?
  • If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do you get you money back? (Granted you lived)
  • Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?
  • Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?
  • Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?
  • Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
  • Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
  • Can you get cornered in a round room?
  • Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?
  • Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?
  • If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
  • Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?
  • In that song, she'll be coming around the mountain, who is she?
  • How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?
  • Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?
  • Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
  • Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
  • Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable?
  • "Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"
  • Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?
  • Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is clear??
  • Why is it that when you get out of a swimming pool, your urine is hotter when you use the restroom?
  • What happens if you put this side up face down while popping microwave popcorn?
  • Why is chopsticks one of the easiest songs to play on the piano, but the hardest thing to eat with?
  • How come you play at a recital, but recite at a play?
  • If a fork were made of gold would it still be considered silverware?
  • If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?
  • Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside?
  • Do they have girl’s bathrooms in gay bars?
  • Why is toilet bowl cleaning liquid only blue?
  • Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?
  • Why doos shaped macaroni taste better than the normal kind?
  • Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?
  • Why can't you get a tan on your palms?
  • If your sick for one week and on one of those days they had to cancel school because of snow, do you have to make up that day in June?
  • Why do dogs sniff other dog’s bottoms to say hello, why don’t they just bark in their face or something?
  • Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been free?
  • If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?
  • You know the expression, "Don't quit your day job?" Well what do you say to people that work nights?
  • Why do you get in trouble for blocking an exit when you're standing in the doorway? In case of an emergency, wouldn't you run out, too, therefore NOT blocking the exit?
  • Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?
  • Why is a square meal served on round plates?
  • Why is the 0 on a phone after 1 and not before 1?
  • Which way does a compass point in space?
  • Why are people allowed to put naked statues outside but why can't we run outside naked?
  • Why do all superheroes wear spandex?
  • If mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
  • Why did Mary own a little lamb?
  • If a missing person sees their picture on a milk carton that offers a reward, would they get the money?
  • Why can’t a baby cry while it’s inside its mother?
  • If the president were gay, would his husband be the first man?
  • If you were a genie and a person asked you this wish, "I wish you would not grant me this wish" what would you do?
  • Why are Pringles curved?
  • What happens if your snot freezes in your nose?
  • Why aren't safety pins as safe as they say they are?
  • If overalls are held up by the snaps at the top, then why do they have belt loops?
  • Why is it that its good to score under par in golf but its bad to be “under par” in any thing else?
  • Is Jerry Garcia grateful to be dead?
  • Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?
  • Can bald men get lice??
  • How come popcorn isn't a vegetable?
  • Do movie producers still say lights, camera, and action when it is a dark scene?
  • Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them?
  • Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are both the same number of letters?
  • Why is snow white and ice clear? Aren't they just different forms of water?
  • Why do they put the names of football teams on baseball caps?
  • If I had my legs amputated, would I have to change my height and weight on my driver's license?
  • How come you pay an extra 25 cents to get something put on your hamburger but they don't take off the price if you get something taken off?
  • Can you get cornered in a round room?
  • Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?
  • Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?
  • If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
  • Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?
  • In that song, she'll be coming around the mountain, who is she?
  • "How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?"
  • Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?
  • If you were under house arrest and you lived in a mobile home, wouldn’t you be able to go anywhere you want?
  • If our body temperature is normally 98.6 degrees, how come when it's 98 degrees outside, no one is comfortable?
  • What would happen if you were to feed a pig some bacon?
  • If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future?
  • Do pyromaniacs wear blazers?
  • If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?
  • How come only car keys are the only keys with teeth on both sides?
  • Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
  • Why is it the TWELVE days of Christmas when there is only one day of Christmas?
  • When something's funny why is it called a "knee-slapper" when you actually slap your thigh?
  • Is sign language the same in languages other than English?
  • Why is "number" abbreviated as "no"? When there is no "o" in number?
  • Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work?
  • Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?
  • Who gets to keep the pennies in a wishing well?
  • If you went back in time and killed your mother would you disappear the moment you killed her?
  • If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
  • Why is Donkey Kong called "DONKEY" Kong if he's a monkey?
  • If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?
  • How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
  • Do the air bubbles that are created when you fart in water, smell when they pop?
  • When a boy is named after his dad, he is called 'Junior,' but what do
  • you call a girl that is named after her mother?
  • Just what was the "Baby On Board" sign for? Did it help us decide which car not to hit in case of an accident?
  • 364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that ?
  • Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do you find something funny? When obviously we do?
  • Why do people say PIN number when that truly means Personal Identification Number Number?
  • Since there is a rule that states "i" before "e" except after "c", wouldn't "science" be spelled wrong?
  • If the S.W.A.T team comes to your house and breaks down your door, do they replace it later?
  • Why is it that on the back of a medicine bottle it says "adult" is 12 and above, but the adult age in reality is 18?
  • Why do dogs walk around in circles before lying down?
  • Can a metal plate in your head get rusted?
  • Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves?

Got plenty more from where they came from. Some of them may be duplicates of what Robert posted.
 
Why do people say PIN number when that truly means Personal Identification Number Number?
Click to expand...

If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future?
Click to expand...

Very nice ones ;) The second one is actually quite interesting, lol.
 
Goofy stands erect while Pluto is on all fours because of Evolution, my friends. Science rejoice :p

Either that or Pluto can stand erect but is usually too sauced to be able to do so.
 
http://alt-usage-english.org/I_before_E.html
that shall explain the i before e thing. and if you remember back to grammar school, it is...
i before e, except after c, except in the rule of exceptions.

well, at least that is what i was taught. but, if you arent familiar with it, then yeah, it is a vewy good question.

anyways, thanks for a good laugh guys.
 
Blank Verse said:
Goofy stands erect while Pluto is on all fours because of Evolution, my friends. Science rejoice :p

Either that or Pluto can stand erect but is usually too sauced to be able to do so.
Click to expand...

I favour the later, and why does Donald Duck walk about all day with no pants on but wears a towel to get out of the shower???
 
Let me ruin your game.

Can you cry under water?

Yes. Ever worn goggles?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Assassinated usually have ideological or political motivation

Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. But it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

£0.01 = $0.02

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Depends how well you liked those clothes.

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

Cheaper to produce.

What disease did cured ham actually have?

Dunno what that is :p (I'm a vegetarian).

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Proove it then I'll answer it.

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

2 words: cot death.

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Yes, because the hearing is done by the judge & jury; the prosecuted has to do the telling.

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

The majority of people in movies are chosen well and always mentioned "in" the credits. Wheras in a TV, such as news or gameshows, they aren't shown so you're not "in" the credits, you're "on" the screen.

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

It's an elevated sense of power!

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

It's more awkward to watch someone undress than it is to see them naked.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Bra is short for brassiere.

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

different types of bread.

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Because he's a fictional character.

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

No, a corpse is not a person - it's a corpse of a person. Carpool clearly states 2 or more "people".

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Not in his line of field.

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Cartoons are fictional.

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

You can't buy those meep meep birds as dinner, and it's something he really, really wants.

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

Mostly water. (Babies are also mostly water, 60%).

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Ever read the darwin awards?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Yes.

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

To test your theory.

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ---?

Because you're looking too much into the english language.

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

(S)he's in control that way.
 
Colin, you sure have nothing better to do. :p

I had a good laugh at both the questions and the answers.
 
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